9.05.2005

disciplinary action

today, i had to confront two of our staff. theirs was a case of theft and tampering official documents.

my mind is made up. the code of conduct states that these offenses are tantamount to dismissal. i just need to get their statements as part of the "due process".

the first one came up. he pleaded guilty. even if he is the team's senior technician, he revealed that it was the younger tech's idea.

when it was the junior tech's turn, he pleaded the same and acknowledged their fault. they were downright broke that day.

while they were speaking, i never sensed any hint of shame nor remorse. i thought, "that's tough". how could they pull it off?

alright. wait til they get a Termination Letter from me.

just as i was about to pack my things and leave, the senior tech gently asked if he could consume his compensatory leave the next two days. "Why?", i asked. "it's my son's birthday tomorrow", he replied.

then... everything just became a blur. thoughts kept pouring over my head, wondering why these things happen. i suddenly felt compassionate and thought how he's gonna feed his family after i terminate him.

yet, i begin to ask again why i have to terminate him? why is it in my hands to judge? to decide? i console myself, thinking i have been put there for a reason. people need to be disciplined, and as long as you don't discipline, they will never learn in life and keep on doing the same things over and over again. and not disciplining means you don't care enough to bring it to their attention and do something about it. all it takes is one decision. and whatever i decide upon will bear its effects on the two technicians' lives.

life is perplexing. i wish i was a teacher who just has to mark her students' grades. then, life would be simpler, wouldn't it?

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